I feel like I should start this post by letting everyone know that I'm slightly bitter right now. I should be in Phoenix right now where it's about 65 degrees celebrating one of my good friends nuptials. This stupid broken ankle has thrown a wrench in my plans because traveling alone on crutches would suck...especially when i have luggage and have to take a train to the airport.
So aside from that I guess the one thing that's really been on my mind is this... which really does not seem like such a difficult thing but yet here i am: Why would anyone push the issue of being in a relationship when they know they won't be able to give you 100%? I had read some interesting things about relationships and one of the tips really made me think. It said that each person shouldn't be giving 50% to the relationship. They should both be giving 100% to the relationship. This is so true. If you aren't able to do this then don't bother getting into one. I get that there are other things in life: work, friends, hobbies, etc. But there needs to be a certain balance. (Sorry, but I'm a Libra. Balancing things matter to me whether I can pull it off all the time or not.) Like it or not, you can't expect someone to give you their all if you're not willing to give yours. Whatever you're willing to invest you get back. Basically there was a time when I wasn't necessarily ready to get into a serious relationship. The other person kind of pushed the issue and made me feel like if I didn't jump then I'd lose the opportunity. I decided this person was worth it and the fear of it all was silly. I'd truly be missing out if I didn't go for it. But here's the thing: don't make me feel like I should really get myself into it if you aren't really and truly ready to give 100% to it. It's not fair to the other person. I just can't grasp it. If you want a relationship that bad and it's enough that you're really willing to make another person feel that pressure then you better be damn well ready to put that effort in. And relationships aren't just a part time deal. It's a friend, it's a lover, it's a family, it's a support system that you have to nourish and take care of. Nothing is ever perfect but it requires work whether you want it to or not. That's all.
Anyway, I had a really awesome and strange dream last night. Basically, I got a puppy. In my dream for whatever reason I kept telling people it was a pug, but it was really an tiny english bull dog puppy. You know how sometimes in your dreams something is one way but really it's something completely different? That's basically it. So whoever gave me this puppy did it anonymously. And the way they delivered it was odd. They put it on the bottom shelf of the oven. The oven wasn't turned on of course... I have weird dreams and I'm very aware of this. Anyway, I walked around with it a lot... it peed when I was carrying it in the grocery store and I had to clean it up. When it got dehydrated it started to look sort of plastic but as soon as i gave it water it perked back up and was a normal puppy. One of these instances of dehydration was especially weird because the puppy was hanging out behind my grandmother's oven and he started to get plastic looking... and apparently I had recently had a baby that no one knew about that was also behind the oven which also looked plastic and dehydrated... and what did I do? I ignored the baby, got the puppy water, didn't mention the baby to anyone and moved on with my life. I also almost accidentally drowned the puppy in a bowl of water but quickly corrected that situation. I was so excited to have this puppy, and in my dream I was all like "Yeah this is real!! I really have this puppy!!!" And then I woke up. What is wrong with me?!
No comments:
Post a Comment